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PostPosted: Mon Nov 07, 2016 5:03 pm 
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A reader writes:

Hello, dear Domain Owner.

Domain Availability Notice - [soundalike version of one of my domain names deleted]

We would like to make you aware that you can now submit an offer for [soundalike version of one of my domain names deleted]. We understand how important is for you to have all domains relevant to your business name.

Make a bid today :
[URL deleted]

Some of the benefits you will receive by owning this domain:
* Offering more resources and information to your Target Market
* Allows for more in-links to your site
* Higher Placement within the Search Engines

Unsub-scribe:
[URL deleted]

Sincerely yours
Your Domain Club
501 Silverside Rd Ste 105
Wilmington, DE 19809-1376

'I m a Marketer, I don t believe in Brands , but I believe in Quality and quality has different definitions' - ?????? ????

---------------------

Dear "Your,"

Thank you for worrying about whether people will mistype the name of my web page and not go to it enough to warn me that you've come up with another spelling of the thing that you'd like to sell me out of the goodness of your heart. I actually have snagged a few soundalike doman names over the years, but they were in fields where there was a lot of unethical competition.

Fortunately in the case, I don't expect to happen, and if nothing else, my current readers know where to go for the information I store on that site. Feel free to start a site with that name yourself and spend the next seventeen years filling it with quality information related to the site name. Maybe by then the next person who spells my site name wrong accidentally and goes to the other site will be fooled. But I'm not sure that's a sustainable business model for you.

You might have more luck teaming up with my friend the Exiled Nigerian Prince, who has had trouble setting up his own web page. If you can come up with a name that works better than ExiledNigerianPrince.com and help him get established, I know he would be grateful. In fact, I think he'd be glad to give you a generous down payment just to get you started on the effort. Would $500,000 be enough to attract your interest in such a project?

Simply go to his existing contact page http://exilednigerianprince.com and enter the required information, including the bank account number and routing code where you would like the money to be deposited. The Prince is currently on an extended river tour of the Mississippi, and only had intermittent access to the Internet, but as soon as he is back online, he will transfer the money and get you started on the project.

Best of luck! (You'll need it.)


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 09, 2016 2:56 pm 
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Posts: 7
Paul,

By now you know that the Candidate has won the presidency. I don't suppose there's an easy way for you to go back and take down all the nasty stuff we said about him - he seems to be vindictive and prone to suing people and worse.

When we parted ways, I was able to get back down to New Orleans in time to vote, so I did my part. But, of course, you know that Louisiana has a long history of being run by racist demagogues, so it's, sadly, what we're used to, and nobody seemed to have a problem with this particular racist demagogue. Sorry, I just did it again, didn't I?

Mutabe wanted to know if we could get all the way to Canada on this boat. Actually we could, if we didn't mind going through a sort of canal in the Chicago area. I don't know how far we'll really get, though. Especially since cold weather will soon be closing in up north.

We're heading back north, and I'm at one of the bait-shop/cafes we've been to before. There are a lot of things I could say about the events of the last few days, but I'm exhausted and, frankly, heartsick. Mutabe has offered to drive for a while. I know he's as tired as I am, but I'm going to let him, so I can get some sleep. Maybe I'll sleep for the next four years. Wonder how far we can get in that timeframe?

Your friend's friend,

Shucks


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2016 12:21 pm 
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Someone calling himself/herself the unlikely name of Ashley Bailey writes:

Hi,
I tried reaching you at 8669073607 and could not connect with you, so I figured I would follow up with an email.
I noticed that you are currently running AdWords or have in the past for [web site url withheld]. 9 out of 10 times I speak to people they are typically wasting 40 to 60 percent of the budget on wasted clicks and missing out on a huge return on investment.
I am a Google certified specialist and have been managing AdWords accounts for years now. I can do an analysis on your account and show you first hand how much money is being wasted and how I can make you more money. If I cannot show you how to improve your ROI or any value at all then I will give you one of the following at no cost:
1. Free website mock up
2. Free hosting for 1 year
3. Free mobile website optimization
4. $500 off of ANY of our services
Do you have some time to do an analysis this week? I assure its worth it.
Best,
Ashley Bailey
info@1stpageclub.com
1stpageclub.com
310-439-8703

----------------------
Ashley,
Congratulations on discovering that dialing the Bradford Exchange customer service hotline does not reach me.
Ordinarily I might be impressed enough by your astute powers of observation to try your services. But my life circumstances at the moment preclude me investing any money with people who can't even tell the difference between my site and the site that sells plates with pictures of John Wayne to "discerning collectors." (Not that I have anything against John Wayne, or even Bradford Exchange, but $120 plates with the Duke's likeness? What's that about?)

I'm keeping your contact information, though. My friend the Exiled Nigerian Prince is always looking for ways to make his web pages, etc., more profitable, so he can increase his philanthropy. At the moment, he is on an extended river tour of the Mississippi basin, so he doesn't always have good internet access. However, he likes to pay for things up front, by bank deposit, so if you think you would like to work with him, please go to his contact page [ http://exilednigerianprince.com ] and enter the requested information, including your bank account and routing number information. As soon as he is back online, he will deposit $10,000 into your account, then contact to you to explain what he expects in return.

If there is any problem with your bank account in relationship to this offer, please call the number you tried earlier (866-907-3607). I am assured that operators are standing by. And while you're there, ask them about the $120 plates with pictures of John Wayne.


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PostPosted: Thu Nov 10, 2016 12:29 pm 
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Someone calling himself Richard Williams writes:

Hi Paul Race,

It is now easier than ever to build a professional website, with the expert team; we will build a professional website for "exilednigerianprince.com" and set everything up for you from exilednigerianprince.com to a custom email address.

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MAIL US/ CALL US at 773 382 8125 WE ARE HERE TO OFFER A WORLD CLASS SERVICE TO MAKE YOUR WEBSITE STAND OUT IN THE ONLINE INDUSTRY.

REGARDS,
Richard Williams
Direct:773 382 8125
Office:312 762 5999
Website: http://www.premium-design.info
Email: subscribers@premium-design.info
You have received this message from Premium-Design. You can unsubscribe/update your preferences or report abuse. Premium-Design, Chi, Cago, IL, United States.

---------------------------------

Dear Mr. Williams
Did you just offer to create a web page for the most famous fraudster in Internet history? If that is your intent, I am sure he will be delighted enough to pay you very well for the assistance. How does $50,000 sound as a starting point? If that seems agreeable, simply go to his contact page [ http://exilednigerianprince.com ] and enter the requested information, including your bank account number and routing code. He will deposit the agreed-up down payment as soon as he gets back online, and then contact you with the details of what he would like to see.

If you have any trouble related to this transaction, please call 310-439-8703 and ask for Ashley Bailey. I'm sure he or she will be glad to help you sort things out.

Also, your "capslock" key seems to be malfunctioning. You might want to get that checked out.


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PostPosted: Thu Dec 01, 2016 4:00 pm 
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Posts: 1004
A reader writes:

(Please forward this to your CEO, because this is urgent. Thanks)
We are the domain registration and solution center in China. On Nov 28, 2016, we received an application from Kehe Ltd requested "riverboatmusic" as their internet keyword and China (CN) domain names (riverboatmusic.cn, riverboatmusic.com.cn, riverboatmusic.net.cn, riverboatmusic.org.cn). But after checking it, we find this name conflict with your company name or trademark. In order to deal with this matter better, it's necessary to send email to you and confirm whether your company have relations with this Chinese company or not?

Best Regards,
Karen Xu | Service & Operations Manager
China Registry (Head Office) | 6012, Xingdi Building, No. 1698 Yishan Road, Shanghai 201103, China
Tel: +86-2161918696 | Fax: +86-2161918697 | Mob: +86-13816428671

Email: karen@chinaregistry.org.cn
chinaregistry405@aliyun.com
Web: www.chinaregistry.org.cn

This email contains privileged and confidential information intended for the addressee only. If you are not the intended recipient, please destroy this email and inform the sender immediately. We appreciate you respecting the confidentiality of this information by not disclosing or using the information in this email.

-------------------------------------

Dear Karen,

I am glad you notified me that the China-based food services supplier Kehe Ltd is planning to use the name Riverboatmusic.XXX.cn in its future business plans. Perhaps they will start selling banjos, Appalachian dulcimers, and other North American Folk instruments in China, where, frankly, most entry-level instruments are being built anyway.

Perhaps China is experience a revival of interest in North American Folk music? That would be a very positive development. As long as the musicians focus on the aspects of Folk music that bring people together, and not on the aspects of Folk music that protest injustice and corruption, because in a country that is still controlled by a totalitarian dictatorship, that sort of thing can backfire.

Come to think of it, the U.S. seems to be lurching toward a totalitarian dictatorship as well, so maybe I should keep my banjos locked up until I see which way the wind is blowing.

Nahhh, I'm just kidding about that last part.

If you have a contact for the Kehe person who is interested in promoting North American folk instruments in your part of the world, please let me know. I will give him or her all the guidance they need.

Best of luck,

Paul


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 03, 2017 7:54 am 
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Posts: 7
Paul,

The Prince and I apologize for being offline so long. We've been harried from town to town since we got away from the Candidate and his clueless friend. The truth is, I fully expected to see them ridden out of town on a rail, tarred and feathered. But things went exactly the opposite, and we are suffering the feedback. And, frankly, there was a long time when I didn't even know what to say.

Mutabe is told in every town we visit that he should "go back where he came from." I'm told every day that it's my Christian responsibility to hate Mutable and treat him as if he is less than human. Apparently, after a generation or so of everybody pretending that rampant racism, misogyny, xenophobia, and hating in general was only flourishing among a few extremists, the Candidate's campaign gave all the haters and bigots a sort of "permission" to "come out of the closet." It turns out that, among large swaths of white America, attitudes toward people of color haven't changed since the Civil War. I am ashamed of my country, and sometimes even ashamed of my color.

Folks keep assuring me that not everyone who voted for the Candidate is a hater. That's true, but everyone who voted for the Candidate VOTED for a hater. By the same token, not everyone who voted for the Candidate is a swindler. But everyone who voted for the Candidate VOTED for a swindler. Not everyone who voted for the Candidate is a serial adulterer. But everyone who voted for the Candidate VOTED for a serial adulterer. Why? Because the most immoral man ever to run for the presidency in this country promised to run things according to "Christian principles"? How deluded can people get?

I'm going to add this: "Christian" and "Hater" are mutually exclusive. Christians who read their Bible know that Jesus went out of his way to befriend and help people who were not like Him, including Samaritans (Palestinians, in modern terms), Syrians, and Romans. And His followers went to the ends of the known earth to reach people of other nations, cultures, and colors. Only ignorant and twisted people could honestly believe that hating people of other cultures is compatible with Jesus' teachings. But apparently there are a lot of ignorant and twisted people.

I was hoping things would get better as we got farther north. But every time we stop, we see streets lined with campaign signs for the Candidate, as if the people who voted for him want to rub the rest of our noses in his victory. In one cafe, a bunch of obese and unwashed men in camo gear threatened to beat both Mutabe and me up because we sat at the same table. I talked our way out of it. The truth is, we could have taken them, but in that town, the chances of us both going to jail and only one of us coming out in the near future were very high. Hatred is alive and well, and since the election, it is walking the streets with arrogance and pride.

If only the haters would stop calling themselves Christians, that would be a step in the right direction.

Sorry, if this seems like a very negative post. There are days on end when I can only think negative thoughts about a country where even folks who consider themselves "Christians" or at least "good people" can be so deceived, much less - in many cases - so full of irrational hate and fear. I am afraid that the phrase "Depart from Me; I never knew you" is going to cover a lot of self-righteous folks who don't bother to let their Bibles influence their behavior toward people who aren't just like them.

Your friend's friend,

Mutabe


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 09, 2017 7:50 pm 
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Posts: 1004
Someone calling himself the improbable name of Darryl Bareford writes:

Subj: Re: New Invoice #6322-16
This email is being sent in order to inform you that a new invoice has been generated for your account.
Please see the file that is attached.
[Virus-containing zip file withheld from this page]
The file is password protected to protect your information.
The password is 123456
Thank you.
Darryl Bareford
zsfhr@ibselectronics.net

-----------------------------------------------------------

Dear Darryl,

Thank you for being so careful to make certain I stay caught up with bills for services and products I never requested or received.

I want to thank you especially for protecting me by sending me a password-protected file, and including the password in the same e-mail with the file. You have no idea how much this extra level of precaution means to me.

On the other hand, I'm a little put off that the password you set me is - to quote Spaceballs - the combination an idiot would put on his luggage." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JNGI1dI-e8

I'm even more put off by you assuming I'm a big enough idiot to open a binary file from a stranger, no matter what kind of text you put around it.

I have an idea, why don't you open the file on your computer, cut and paste the text parts of it, then send me another e-mail with the content in flat ascii text. That way I can see it without opening any binary files. I'm sure if you really want money from me, you'll be glad to comply.

Unless, Heaven forbid, the file you sent me is not an invoice at all, but a nasty virus that will either hang up my computer or take control of my e-mail and send fake "invoices" to everyone in my address book.

No, why would a perfect stranger wish such a thing on me?

Either way, I hope you have the 2017 you so richly deserve!


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 09, 2017 10:53 pm 
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Posts: 1004
Someone calling herself Michele or else Nida Zhang writes:

Quoting Michelle <michelle@fishingbearing88.com>:


Nice to know you are in the line of fishing.
You may interested in doing copy jigging lures as your design.
If yes,email us for details.
jigging lures catalogues with prices will be send at your request.

Best Regards,
Nida Zhang
bearing2007@126.com
ShengFe Industrial Co., Ltd
Phone: 86-15989618425 (WhatsApp)
Tel:86-769-83719948 Fax:86-769-82830189
Skype: nida520 WeChat: nida198717
Add: ShengTai Road, TianRaoBu Industiral Park,
HengLi Town, DongGuan, GuangDong,China

Follow us by facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/shengfebearing/

---------------------------------

Dear Nida/Michelle,

Thank you for your repeated attempts to get me to sell fishing lures. I'm sure they are fine lures, and I'm sure there would be many people in this country who would be pleased to see the photos and have access to the merchandise.

That said, I manage 15 different web sites on a very wide range of topics, and not one of them has anything to do with fishing lures or fishing, or, frankly, outdoor sports of any kind. That is probably a failing on my part, but I'll have to live with that, I suppose.

In the meantime, I have some friends traveling on the Mississippi river who might like to try some of your lures - stopping at local restaurants for meals isn't working out for them so well. I'll forward them your information. If a fellow named "Shucks" or another fellow named Mutabe contacts you, you'll know I sent them, and that, unlike me, they might actually have a use for fishing lures at this time in their journey.

Have a wonderful 2017!


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 14, 2017 9:30 am 
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Posts: 1004
Someone with the fake e-mail address comite.luxembourg@redcross-fr.be writes:

[Binary File Withheld]
Archive Name: EMAIL_4902_webresponse.zip
Archive File Size: 45514 bytes
File Count: 1 file

Attributes Size Modified Date Method Ratio
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
1800.doc ----- 115200 14-Jan-2017 19:05 Deflated 39.4%
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

---------------------------------------

Dear Comite, or whatever your name is,

I don't even open files from people who bother to put together a halfway believable scam, much less from people who JUST send the files.

You need help.

Fortunately I know just the fellow who can help you put together effective scam e-mails, the Exiled Nigerian Prince, who is currently on an extended small-boat cruise of the Mississippi. He would be glad to help you put together an entirely believable scam for the sum of $200. Unfortunately, he cannot accept wire transfers, due to his continuous movement. But he can accept a direct deposit. Tell you what, if you go to his home page [ ExiledNigerianPrince.com ] and enter the requested banking information, he will get in contact with you and work out exactly what kind of scam you're interested in running. Once you're both satisfied with the agreement, he'll withdraw exactly $200 from your bank account and start working on your customized scam package.

Here's hoping you achieve the results you deserve!


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 18, 2017 10:00 pm 
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Joined: Thu May 15, 2014 3:39 pm
Posts: 1004
Someone calling himself Julian Thompson writes:

Subject line: Question

Whether you have high credit card processing rates, or low rates, we will beat your current rate and save you a ton of money, guaranteed or we pay you.

Our Insane Promise:
If you process over $10K in cards each month and we can't beat your current processing rate, we'll cut you a check for $500! (not a joke - we're dead serious)

We would like the opportunity to earn your business by saving you money and proving you with exceptional service. Please let me know when we can speak about your current rates and provide you with information on what our services can do for you.

Thanks!

Julian Thompson - Merchant Processing Account Specialist
datalogicx@gmail.com
zip_add: 91423
city_add: Los Angeles
E_Mail_List: email_yes
name: Julian Thompson
state_add: CA

-------------------------------------------------------
Julian,

It is always nice to hear from total strangers who shield their own identity behind fake names and G-mail addresses but want to offer me financial services.

The truth is that I don't make enough money through credit card sales for you to bother with me. But I do have a friend who might could use your services. The Exiled Nigerian Prince is currently on an extended river cruise through the American heartland, but he told me the other day he was interested in changing credit card processors. I'll put in a good word for you the next time I hear from him.

In the meantime, he will gladly give you, say, $54,000 to start the signup procedure at your convenience. To receive the money, simply go to the Exiled Nigerian Prince's contact page ( http://exilednigerianprince.com ) and enter the requested banking information, including your bank account number and routing code. The next time he has internet access, he will deposit the $54,000 into your account and contact you with details about his credit card processing needs.

Here's hoping your services get the attention they deserve.


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Paul Race playing a banjo. Click to go to Paul's music home page.Whatever else you get out of our pages, I hope you enjoy your music and figure out how to make enjoyable music for those around you as well.

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